Hmm…That wasn’t supposed to happen
My husband and I bought an expensive but beautiful floor lamp on impulse about a year ago. We don’t normally spend lots of money on such things–I mean come on, it’s just a lamp. Normally, we buy used or take stuff that people don’t want and make due. But we decided to splurge this one time. Anyway, when we got the lamp home, I immediately put it together and turned it on. Everything about the fixture was perfect: the color, the size, and the scale. We had done good or so it seemed.
Long about this time, my youngest had just learned to walk and was still a bit wobbly on her feet. Now we had warned the kids that they were not to run in the living room or to go around the lamp, but….. Well you should know where this is going. My youngest in curls lost her balance and had grabbed hold of the lamp to steady herself. Only the lamp didn’t stay put. CRASH! To the floor it went. She was fine and not hurt, but I couldn’t say the same for the lamp’s glass shade. The biggest piece of broken shade that I could find was no bigger than a quarter. She must have hit it in just the right place to make it shatter like that. There was not gonna be any gluing of this back together.
I wanted to cry and I think maybe I did for a split second. All that money—$106.00 dollars, tax included, to be exact— down the drain. Oh, well; it was just a lamp, right? We should’ve known better with young kids still in the house. And naturally the place we bought the lamp from didn’t sell replacement parts.
Hubby was speechless when he came home and turned a funny color like he had just eaten something bad. Needless to say the lamp was placed into the hall closet and forgotten about. For a whole year, there it stayed behind the winter coats. Until just recently.
On one of my many cleaning escapades, I drug it out and dusted it off. Hubby got sick all over again at the sight of it and told me to get rid of it. But I just couldn’t throw it away so I set out to find another glass shade or something else that would work just as well. No luck.
Apparently, after shopping every lamp and home interior shop in town and on the internet, folks just don’t make parts for stuff anymore. Everything is meant to be disposable, I guess. I was ready to give up when my husband surprised me. He told me to just go and buy another lamp—just like the one we had.
We did and once again the lamp looks stunning in our living room. Only this time we noticed the tiny piece of paper inside the box that said if we needed to order parts to call this number. DOH!!!! I swear that paper wasn’t in the other lamp box. We called, and within one day got our replacement glass shade for free via Fedex. Now all I had to do was to ‘fix’ the other lamp and we would have two beauties gracing our living room.
I worked all day yesterday on the thing, taking it apart and putting it back together. Now, before I go on I feel the need to tell you something. I’ve rewired numerous lamps, installed lighting fixtures, and hung ceiling fans more than I can count in my life time. I’ve rewired wall sockets and installed new ones. What I’m trying to say is this: I know a little about electrical stuff…enough not to burn down the house anyway.
I finished the lamp late evening. With the new glass shade sitting atop the fixture and a new bulb installed, I gave the word for my son to plug it in. We all held our breath in excitement and anticipation. That’s when the other lights in the house dimmed. Suddenly, before I could tell my son to unplug the lamp’s cord, it exploded in flame. Yes, flame. And It ran quickly up the length of the cord to the lamp of which I was standing on a chair next too.
My younger girls began screaming and ran to the corner of the room. My oldest son freaked out and ran out of the house. I guess he figured it was everyman for himself. I immediately went to the breaker box and shut down the main breaker as we don’t have a fire extinguisher in the house (and I was in too much of a hurry to sit there and read all the labels on the breakers). I know, I know…how stupid is that? To live in a log house with lots of kids and not own an extinguisher…
When I returned, I unplugged the melted cord from the wall and checked out the electrical box in the wall to make sure it was fine and not spreading the fire through the wiring. Everything was fine. Except for the carpet which was burned in spots, but I’ve always hated that carpet anyway.
I opened up all the doors and windows to get the smoke out and the smell. There is nothing worse than smelling burnt plastic, trust me. And by this time, I had also managed to find my oldest son outside and get him back in to help me.
My youngest girls were still in the corner crying, with the curly headed one wanting her blanket. My youngest son was annoyed that the lights were off. He was playing spaceman and I was told that you can’t play spacemen without the lights being on. My oldest daughter was next door playing with the neighbor kids. She hasn’t forgiven herself yet for missing out on mama setting fire to the floor lamp.
Yeah, yeah; laugh it up.
I switched the breaker back on, telling my oldest to yell out if fire shot from the socket. I heard nothing. All the excitement was over. I cleaned up the mess and then made dinner. When daddy came home the kids blurted out that, “Mommy tried to burn down the house. It was cool!” Once again, I had reached the ‘cool’ status.
After going over things in my mind, I think i have figured out what went wrong. Normally, I would check out the entire cord for nicks or breaks. I didn’t do that this time. I had assumed that the cord was fine, after all it was new when it got broke. Second, I let the kids distract me and didn’t double check my work. One of the wires connected to the light socket could have been touching something that it shouldn’t have been. Either way, it was a dumb mistake.
Oh, well. At least the lamp is still in one piece and looks nice even if it doesn’t work. Only now we, my husband and I, have decided that two floor lamps in the living room is one too many. Seems ya can’t win for loosing!
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About the crazy lady…
—I’m a middle aged Southern woman… deep south ‘Southern’. If I say or use the word ‘honey’ in a sentence (or in this case a review/comment ), It doesn’t mean I’m hitting on you. I’ve had many a person take this the wrong way. This word is simply just embedded in my vocabulary. Maybe hypnosis would help…
—I’m married…..happily married. I’ve been with my first and only husband now for almost 19years. Yes, I’m one of those people. And If one of us should ever become single, it’s because one of us took a shotgun to the other.
— We have five wonderful kids ( between the ages of 13 & 4) that I absolutely love and adore. Okay; so I may have mentioned once, maybe twice, that I wanted to auction them off on EBay. But they were driving me crazy those few days. You try living in a house with that many kids…
—I love photography. Who knows, one day I might make the move up to amateur photographer. It’s such a big step….
— I absolutely love to cook. What Southerner doesn’t? ‘Course if you were to ask my family, they would say that not everything I cook is fit for human consumption. It might give you consumption though….
— Lastly, I’m a stay at home mom…who the neighbors think is nutty as a fruit cake. So I might carry on converstations with my chickens…and yell at the birds stealing my pecans while dressed in my PJ’s. But I’ll have you know, I’ve only had the fire department over once since we’ve been in our new home. I was just tired of doing the laundry and thought it would be easier to just set fire to it all in the front yard and start over. I mean come on, who hasn’t done that?
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