Looking for the silver lining

It’s quite this morning. Hubby has left for work already and the kids are sleeping in late.  That in itself is a small blessing for me. It means that I get to have some time to myself.  Just me, my coffee, my thoughts, and my computer. You’d think I’d be somewhat happy.  I’m not.  I’m struggling this morning to say the least.

Seems that my Bah-humbug attitude has carried it’s negative self past  December 25.  I wish it would go away. The everyday things are getting to me; piling up, breaking me down, and stealing my joy.  I feel out of sorts with the world around me and very angry because of it.  Now, I know what you’re gonna say….’It’s because of that time of the month.’  Some of it is, I’ll confess,  but I fear this goes a bit deeper than just hormones.  I’ve lost something inside it seems.

What this ’something’ is, I have a pretty good idea. But I won’t get preachy this morning.

My hubby and I have decided to take a mini-holiday.  We could both use it. We’re heading up country to the old home place for a few days.  I hope to use that time to get things inside of me, right again.  A little alone time with me, God, some good ol’home cooking, and a little country house in the middle of nowhere that is in desperate need of a cleaning (something that I will enj0y doing).

And maybe while we’re there, I’ll take out the camera and snap some photos for y’all.

~later

The otherside..

Well I made it; the holidays are over and I couldn’t be happier.  I literally tore down my decorations and tree and shoved them back into the attic, not caring how the matter was done.

This holiday season was a bit more stressful than last year.  Why?  Not sure; nothing different happened this year.  We did all the usual things and went all the usual places as before.  But, much to horror, I’ve discovered a terrible  thing about me: I’ve become a Scrooge.   Not with my money—at least not with my kids anyway–but in spirit.  I can’t stand the month of December.  I detest it.  I’d rather watch grass grow or paint peel off walls than be subjected to the season again.

Somewhere along the way, I lost my zeal for the Christmas holiday.  I don’t think it’s because I have kids now (until just recently I loved the holiday).  I think the true meaning behind it has gotten lost amongst the glitz.

Anyway, it’s over and done with. Bring on the new year, I say.  Bring it on!