Way out in Left Field

The other day our little church group had it’s weekly meeting. As we crowed into the living room to take our seats, we all noticed a glass of water sitting all by itself in the middle of the coffee table. Just sitting there…mocking us. No one made a comment about it though as we seated ourselves.

The meeting opened with prayer as usual and afterwards our leader cleared her throat and brought our attention back to the glass of water. “Tell me; what do you see here on the table?” she asked. She then pointed to one of us and got the ball rolling.

“A glass half full of water,” one replied.

“A glass half empty of water,” another one answered.

You know where this is going, right? It’s the ol’ optimists vs. the pessimist argument. Everyone sees the glass differently based on their type of personality. One lady even replied that all she saw in front of her was a glass of water. Nothing more; nothing less. She is what’s called a realist: One who sees something simple for what it is.

“You really want to know what I see?” I asked when it became my turn.

“Yes,” they all answered in unison.

I took in a deep breath, changed my seating position a bit and replied, “I see a breakable container sitting on a coffee table filled with water that one: doesn’t belong in the living room in the first place because it’s gonna get knocked over and broke; and two: there’s no coaster under it which means it’s gonna leave a water ring. And we all know that if any one of those two things happens, someone is going to get spanked, sent to their room, and punished when daddy comes home.”

Silence filled the room. Needless to say, they moved on with the discussion and carefully avoided asking me anymore questions.

The moral of the story: Mommy needs to get out and socialize with the world more.